The Struggle That Is Being Tracie

I write more blog posts than you think I do. In fact, I've written so many things, not just blog posts, it's amazing. But where is all this text you ask? In my head. Yes, it is a fact that if there were an invention that would somehow convert thoughts to text I would have many writings attributed to my name. Why is this? Well, because I'm most creative and can write the best when, ironically, I'm not trying to write. Say for instance, right before I go to sleep. I wrote a whole page of a novel yesterday before going to sleep, but it doesn't exist anywhere besides in my own brain. And even that has gotten fuzzy.

It drives me crazy that I can write out whole ideas, plots, concepts, articles, witticisms, etc. in my head and yet when I sit down to write I draw a big blank. My creativity is drowning in my own brain where it can't escape and will never live among the concrete things we call the written word. Today while I was resting, I wrote 3 blog posts that you may or may not ever get the occasion to read. See for me, I'm too frustrated by the time I actually get a pen or a keyboard to actually write out my thoughts. It's just too much work. And by that time, the pretty thoughts have all flickered out and died a disparaging death. Things flow so much better in my head. Like a ballet of words, complete with perfect punctuation and the most appropriate clever expression of thought. If I could only easily get what's IN my head OUT, I would be a much happier person.

I beg of someone to help me in my valiant goals. The first person that can make this invention a reality, I vow to share a part of the proceeds from the money I make from the words I can finally get down on paper. Any takers?


Hurricane Ike

For those that haven't heard, Hurricane Ike is coming up on the Texan coast. Most of Houston and Galveston is being evacuated. Those not required to evacuate are hunkering down in their homes with emergency supplies. Austin's family is in Houston. I ask my family and friends to please keep them in your prayers for the next few days.

EDIT: The storm has now passed and Austin's family are gratefully safe. :)


A Quest for Wisdom

Yesterday I had the much fun experience of getting my wisdom teeth out. I've been dreading getting this done for months and months. I was extremely nervous and almost backed out a few times. I called HayLee the night before to get some reassurance that everything would be okay. And it was. It really wasn't that bad. I got up yesterday morning, ate breakfast (on Hay's recommendation), and drove to the dentist. I picked the movie Hitch to watch, and they got me set up on the nitrous oxide (a.k.a. laughing gas). The gas really helped to calm down my racing heart. Dr. Pincock came in and swabbed me with the bubblegum-ish numbifier stuff. I then got several shots, which frankly were probably the worst part of the whole thing. I got good and numb and then Dr. Pincock yanked out my three wisdom teeth (two on bottom, one on the top left). It was over before I knew it. I couldn't believe it was so fast. After going through it, I don't know why people would want to be put under. It really wasn't that bad. I felt a little pressure, but no pain (besides a little pinch from the shots). The worst part was getting numbed up.

Afterward my mouth was completely numb and full of gauze. Austin picked me up and I tried to communicate with him. I couldn't talk yet as my mouth (and tongue) were still numb. So I tried to use sign to communicate with him. But Austin doesn't know that much. It was pretty funny (and frustrating). Once home Austin made me some jello and went back to work for a while. I myself worked for a few hours until Austin came home with my percosets. I took half of one and stopped working when I started feeling dizzy and nauseous. Fortunately, the jello was done by this time so I swallowed it down and lay on the couch, which helped with the nausea. Austin then stayed home from work so he could take care of me. We watched Friends season 10 all night, only stopping so Austin could pick me up some soup from Zupa's for dinner and of course my all-cherised FroYo.

This morning I'm feeling pretty good. I just rinsed with some salt water (absolutely disgusting) and took another half of a percoset. There is almost no swelling in my cheeks (no chipmunk for me!) as I took the dentist's recommendation to apply hot and cold compresses on and off last night. Now my only concern is avoiding dry socket. It's almost impossible to not do some sort of spitting or sucking motion. So this weekend Austin and I are taking it easy as I recover and await the time that I can once again eat solids.


Adventures in Babysitting

The last three days Austin and I tried our hand at parenting as we watched our nephews Tyson, Preston, and Mason while their parents were away on a cruise. I thought I would sum up my experiences in list format:
Number of times I was woken up in the middle of the night by a screaming child: 2
Number of times I changed soiled bed sheets: 1
Number of times I changed soiled clothing: 3
Number of times I drew bubble baths: 3
Number of sandwiches made: 8
Number of times I helped kids with homework: 5
Number of times I was asked for permission to play the computer or my Nintendo DS: 87
Number of times I said the phrase “be nice”: 212
Number of times I was walked in on while going to the bathroom or showering: 5
Number of times I walked/ran to the school: 6
Number of hours of sleep on average per night: 5
Number of times I was woken up before my alarm went off: every day
Number in minutes of time spent with Austin in the 3-day period: 20
Number in minutes of time to myself in the 3-day period: 40
Number of hours spent working: 32
Number of hours on conference call: 4
Number of times I was interrupted during said conference call: 12
Number of times I solved disputes: 10
Number of times I soothed a crying child: 15
Number of times I saw the kids “group hug”: 1
Number of hugs given/received: 32
Number of kisses given/received: 25
Number of “I love you’s”: 30
Number of kids I will miss despite the utter exhaustion: 3

So this experience taught me a few things: Being a mom is extremely hard and exhausting. Parenting is something I would NEVER want to do by myself. Working full-time and juggling three kids is difficult. I don’t know how Cheryl does it every day. I learned that I do have it in me to be a good mom. I really do think I can do it. (Though I have decided that, if possible, I would prefer to not work full-time.) I have also decided that I am extremely glad that you don’t start out with three young children at once.

I will miss the boys but I’m glad to be back home. I really wish I hadn’t had to work the whole time so I could’ve spent more time playing and having fun with them rather than taking care of them, working, making dinner, cleaning up, and then getting them ready for bed. Austin and I will just have to have them spend the night sometime so we can have some good aunt/nephew bonding fun time. :)


How My Mind Works

So I didn't exactly make my goal to blog every day in August. But I did blog much more, which is something you can all be grateful for. I blogged about 5x more in August in July so that is quite the improvement. This month I'll try to blog on average twice a week.

Anyway, so I was over at Charlotte's blog and she posted some results of online visual personality quizzes. I found this one to be particularly accurate. Here are my results:
About Me: You are a single-minded person who takes pride in making sound judgements and likes to earn the respect of others.

Interaction: You are idealistic and can be extremely loyal and accepting of others. You often remain on the sidelines in social situations choosing to observe rather than participate. Having said that, when you feel comfortable in a social setting, you come alive and enjoy interacting with like-minded people. You even have the chance to exercise that cheeky sense of humor of yours.

Thinking: You enjoy being well-informed and put a great deal of energy into building your understanding and knowledge. You have quite a conventional approach to life. You appreciate the benefits of being neat and organized and do your best to have an ordered mind.

Inspired by anything new and unusual, you tend to look to the future and try to be open to different perspectives on life. Passion comes naturally to you. You like grand gestures and tend to wear your hear on your sleeve.

So it was fun to look at the different pictures and see what my choices said about me. Visit here to learn how your mind works.

I took a different visual quiz and got these results:
Moods: Sofisticat You’re romantic in your outlook and love the simplicity of nature. You can be a little nostalgic and you like landscapes that make you feel calm. When it comes to art, you tend to have a traditional approach. You are passionate about history and true classics. Truly great art stands the test of time. As for music, for you, it’s all about self expression. Nothing beats it to take you away from everyday reality.

Fun: Thriller You really value your “quiet time”— to recharge, and reconnect with yourself. You’re not afraid to take yourself away from the crowd and explore your imagination alone. For kicks, there is nothing like a little affection to give you a buzz. There’s always so much flirting to be done! When it comes to holidays, fun is top priority. You love it when everyone’s having fun—a special magic time with plenty of treats and smiles all around. And what turns you off? People who seem to be smart, until they light up and you realize they are stupid enough to be heading for an early grave.

Habits: Back to Basics You love being a little bit naughty. Being good all the time is too boring—life should be about enjoyment. Your choice of drink shows that you care about your health and make sure you’re putting the right stuff in. As for the home, you’re a bit of a traditionalist. It’s not just function—style is a definite priority.

Social: Thoughtful For you friendship is all about being there for one another. You can’t imagine life without your best friends. And they’re the first place you go when you need some advice, or a shoulder to cry on. When you think of freedom, you think of knowledge. It’s the most empowering feeling.

To try this quiz, go here.