"Tracie needs....."

So I saw this months and months ago and I planned to do it but I didn’t. So anyway, according to my search on Google, these are things that I supposedly need. (Do a search with your name and needs in quotations.)

Tracie needs...
.....to be pushed (I usually manage quite well on my own.)
.....a date (always)
.....to bite some chumps (Now where do I find some chumps?)
.....a dress (a pretty one that fits me and isn’t expensive)
.....a tumble (I think I’ve taken enough tumbles as it is, thank you.)
.....a breakthrough (hmmm....still waiting...)
.....to go to chuckle school (Awesome! I would love to go to Chuckle School.)
.....to take a vacation (Don’t we all?)
.....to lose the bad hair (Bah! I didn’t think it was that bad!)
.....needs help, but can she be saved in time? (This is the question)
.....a reality check (constantly)
.....a chuckle right now (always)
.....to pull the stick out of her gluteus maximus and relax (I’m quite relaxed now but sometimes this is true of me)
.....to win the lottery (yes, yes, I do.)

These were some of the best ones out of five pages of Google searching. Some made me scratch my head (bite chumps?) while others were just funny (pull the stick out of her gluteus maximus and relax). So what, according to the World Wide Web, do you need?


Austin said…
i'm the only chump you should be biting!

here are a couple austin needs:

...a new mexican restaurant like nancy
...high school math and science tutors.
...to shut up.

well i never!
Charity said…
Ha ha, those are pretty funny. I think the chumps may have something to do with the facebook zombie application... they are always talking about biting some chumps on there.

Charity needs
...your titles (hey yeah i do! i can never think of a good title)
...to abandon any pretence of altruism
...your corks
...clothing donations

some of those were pretty predictable, as my name actually has meaning outside of being my name, but some took my by surprise.
Heidi Ferguson said…
This is a good idea...I'm gonna have to steal it for a future blog post. For now, suffice yourself with this:

Heidi needs:

-more privacy
-to finish her latest novel
-a lifeboat Archives
-needs to open her eyes
-needs to heel.
Love it! I am doing this! Right now! Also, can I got ot Chuckle school with you? I could really use some chuckle training, but I would be scared to go by myself. think you could protect me from all the chumps though. :)
Heather said…
done that post already. See the Heather label.

I should warn you that I couldn't use the first three pages because they were sex related. There are a bunch of porn stars and actors named Heather.

So I scrolled down for some reasonable ones.

Let's see what the first one says this time around:

Heather needs more men right now
Heather needs a brassiere
Heather needs something more to be satisfied
Heather needs sex help

Nope, still lots of sex stuff.

I did find later that Heather needs

two therapists
a childhood
a beauty parlor
your help
to wear a bra
a miracle
a Cloudland partner
a date
wants more-$50 million is not enough
a tech makeover
Austin said…
Everybody needs...

Tracie to post something new!!!!
Lechelle said…
the only thing I could get in my search that was not in French, was

Lechelle needs you

I find that very fitting. Lechelle needs you Tracie. I need you to post something!!

You see? Google agrees with Austin

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